What I Wish Someone Had Taught Me Long Ago July 2, 2011

 

“Your philosophy is a way of looking at the universe that guides you in daily life. You probably won’t find it in textbooks.” ~ Richard Bach

 

I used to believe in black and white.

Right and wrong.

True and false.

Then I opened to my spirituality, and discovered metaphysics (the world beyond the physical.) And I realized appearances are deceiving. All that I thought was true and solid in my world suddenly wasn’t.

And the most frustrating of revelations – that the greatest truths are paradoxical. Two opposing principles are true at once! How disturbing is that to a what-you-see-is-what-you-get person?

Here are some things I am learning:

• You’re Never as Conscious as You Think You Are, and You’re Always More Conscious than You Realize – No matter how far I climb, there are always more levels of consciousness to experience. And at the same time, there is always more available to me within my own consciousness than I realize. Like information about prior lifetimes, self-realizations about beliefs, patterns, experiences that are available to me to learn from and change my reality with – if I only access them.

• In Order to Get Something You Have to Let Go of Something – A difficult but real truth. We are conditioned to control what we cherish – hold onto what we love at all costs. Yet to allow the magic in our lives, we need to let go of the fear that if we don’t hold it tight it will disappear. We need to recognize we create the magic, and by letting go of the fear, the judgment, the blame, and sometimes the people and the circumstances, we can use our power to draw to us what we desire.

• You Create Your Entire Reality and Everyone Else Creates Their Entire Reality – “How can this be so?” I wondered for a long time. Yet it is. What’s more, we have created our world where we each create our own realities to be affected by each other. In other words, what I do can help or hurt you. What you do can help or hurt me. Love matters.

• What You Fear the Most is the Key to Your Greatest Freedom – Years and years are spent in the average lifetime avoiding what is most feared. We erect elaborate interior barriers to control and protect us from what we dread. And yet, once we have the courage to stare our fears in the face, they give us the information we need to heal, to change, to grow and to become free from the very fears that bound us. Freedom to finally create the lives we’ve longed for.

• There’s No Free Lunch but the Price Isn’t What I Thought it Was – I used to think you had to “pay your dues” and struggle a predetermined amount of time and then, if you were lucky, you got to have the life you wanted. Well, I was right about getting to have the life you want, but not so right about the dues. Actually the real price is more difficult to pay at times. What’s required is giving up self-pity, victimhood, martyrdom, blame, judgment, denial and letting in how much we really are loved.

• You Need to Be Fully Present and Yet Ignore What “Is” to Attract What “Isn’t” – What a crazy rule, when you look at it objectively. How can you be fully aware while in a life where you have what you don’t want and still focus on what you do? It’s not easy. But it works.

• You Need to Take Full Responsibility for Creating Your Life While Staying Open to Miracles, Guidance and Assistance from Beyond – Once we really get this creating thing down, we realize we don’t have to do it alone. In fact, once we feel powerful enough that we can do it alone we realize we can’t. We need the love and grace and healing of a higher power to assist us. What’s more is, we want it. It’s even more fun, more incredible and more empowering than we could even imagine.

So, as long as we don’t expect black and white, and are comfortable in that gray place in-between (that is both black and white), we’ll be just fine.

In joyous creation,

Boni

Creating for Those You Love (part II of II) May 27, 2011

“Vision: the art of seeing things invisible.”   – Jonathon Swift

 

Since that trip to the shamanic healer, my son had ups and downs with his eyesight and the disease he suffered from. I continued to spend the majority of my time searching for alternative therapy for him and he acquiesced to the treatments, typically with disdain and cynicism.

 

I spent a good deal of the rest of my time looking at why I would have created this scenario in my reality. After all, if we do create it all, I must have created this, either by ‘making’ it happen or ‘letting’ it happen. There are no exceptions, right? Then wasn’t I creating or letting my son having this disease? I had a great deal of confusion around this topic.

 

But I am nothing if not persistent. I continued to work on the only thing I had control over, myself.  I looked at the parts of me that wanted to ‘control’ this situation. I looked at the parts of me that didn’t believe I could have impact on my son. I let go of the control. I changed the beliefs. But because my son was not yet an adult, I remained his champion and made it my responsibility to find answers.

 

One day he came home from school in obvious eye pain. I drove him to the doctor immediately, as fast as I could, with him crying and screaming in the back seat. Once seated in the exam chair he inexplicably fell asleep. I looked quizzically at the doctor.

 

“The body has amazing ways to deal with pain. If pain becomes too severe, the body will simply shut down. He is asleep so he can avoid consciously feeling the pain,” he explained. He was given eye drops to stop the pain and scheduled for surgery the following week.

 

How do you love someone more than life itself, and still be ok with decisions that result in pain and tragedy? How do you not beat yourself up thinking you had somehow ‘let’ this happen? Simple. By realizing this is a free will universe.

 

And like the love the Goddess and God have for us, the highest level of love honors that free will, and does not seek to control, even if we know it is for someone’s own good. Sometimes finding that line between helping and controlling, allowing children to take responsibility for their own lives and being a responsible parent is difficult.

 

We do create it all. Each of us. Individually. And yet, paradoxically, we also have impact on each other. Our energy has impact. Our prayers have impact. Our love has impact.

 

Almost a decade after that first surgery my son was still dealing with this disease. The disease itself causes other diseases, and he developed glaucoma as well as cataracts. He underwent surgeries for both diseases and just after a second glaucoma related surgery he called me from the surgeon’s office.

 

“Mom, something is wrong. The doctor says my retina has detached and wants me to see a retina specialist tonight.”

 

My throat closed. I knew this could very likely mean he would lose his eye. I had two friends who had retinal detachment and it was touch and go even with healthy eyes, requiring days of lying face down in order to allow the greatest chance of success after re-attachment surgery.

 

I knew one of my son’s greatest fears was wearing a glass eye (after the fear of being totally blind). People ask regularly why his eyes look funny, and he’s very sensitive about looking ‘strange’. This news was horrible.

 

I tried not to let him sense my fear. I asked him to call me as soon as he was finished with the next appointment. I hung up and went into action.

 

First, I had to get someone to him ASAP. If he learned he may lose his eye, I didn’t want him to be alone. I was an hour away and could never make it in time, so I called my fiancé to meet my son and support him emotionally.

 

I then called three powerful friends, to send prayers and healing energy to him.

 

Only then, did I sit down and get very, very clear. I realized he had chosen this disease for some reason, on a soul level (being a childhood disease) and it was not up to me to fix it for him or take responsibility for it. I also realized he had created this specific nightmare of being perilously close to losing his eye, for some reason. And yet there was a reason I was in this reality as well.

 

I wanted to help him, but I wouldn’t rob him of a lesson he had chosen on some level to learn. I went into meditation, and had a talk with his Higher Self.

 

“Ok,” I began, “My son is in trouble right now. He is perilously close to losing his eye,” I said mentally to her. My eyes welled up with tears.

 

“I love my son, more than words can say, and I want to give him energy, light, love and healing and it would be my preference that this possibility of a retina detachment totally disappears… but I respect and honor his choice. Please use this energy for his highest and best good.”

 

And then I let go of trying to control the outcome. I would trust his Higher Self. I had (almost) done what I could.

 

I went back to thinking about me, and the world I was creating. I wanted less suffering in my world. I wanted less pain. I would do what I could about that.

 

I went into another meditation. I imagined myself later that night, being ecstatically happy that my fears hadn’t manifest, and my son and his eyes were fine. I felt how that would feel, and a sense of peace came over me.

 

And I knew now, I had done what I could.

 

I came out of mediation and continued to prepare dinner, forcing myself to stay calm and centered as I did so.

 

After an hour passed, I could no longer stand the wait. I called my fiancé, needing to know!

 

“Oh, yeah, I was just going to call you,” he said. “Everything is fine. Apparently the first surgeon made a mistake, and the retina was not detached after all.”

 

Mistake… yeah, right.

 

I called and thanked my physical friends who had sent energy.

 

And I stopped and silently thanked my non-physical friends who had done the same.

 

In joyous creation,

Boni

Warning – this blog could change your life… May 7, 2011

“You cannot teach a man anything, you can only help him learn it within himself.”

 – Galileo

I am so excited to share this with you! For years I’ve struggled with how to explain conscious creation.

And recently, I received (read my guides dropped it into my consciousness – thank you!) The Map! – which makes the entire concept easy to understand, implement and troubleshoot.

Why troubleshoot? Because if you aren’t getting what you want, don’t you want to know why? I know I do.

So without further adieu, The Map!

Where do you begin?

 

You begin with you, and knowing who you are. This is a core concept.

You will come back to this knowing (remembering) time and time again. If this core knowing of who you are is not solid, you will be hard challenged to create what you desire.

I will teach you methods of solidifying this knowing. And you will practice deepening this ownership of who you really are – a divine spark of God, of Goddess, of the divine, and of all that is.

And it is because of owning who you are that the ancillary concept makes sense:

You create your own reality.

Let that in. You create your own reality. You already do this. I will teach you how to be conscious of this fact, but you are already doing it.

And then, dream… imagine… desire…

What do you want? What are the elements of your ideal life? You have to know what you want before you can manifest it. If you don’t know what you want, you probably know what you don’t want! Start there.

For example: I don’t want a job where I have to work so many hours and am paid so little.

The desire: I want a job where I work 40 hours a week or less and am paid double what I am now.

Now state it as an intention: I intend to create a job where I work 40 hours a week or less and I am paid double my current salary (or more!).

Write intentions for every aspect of your life. My intentions include: Money. Work. Relationships. Physical surroundings. Physical body. Life Partnership. Emotional &Mental. Spiritual. Earth & Humanity. Play. Creative. Cosmic.

Expand, imagine the best life can get and most of all, have fun!

And then, flow energy…

What does that mean? It means to somehow give positive emotions and thoughts to the dream. This is where techniques come in.

From the easiest technique – simply reading your intentions, to the most involved, you need to flow energy to your dreams in order to make them manifest. It doesn’t matter which technique you use as much as whether you do flow energy towards the life you want.

And it is just as important to make certain you are not stopping the flow of energy. You may be stopping it without even realizing it!

How does this happen? Well, let’s imagine you want to create more money in your life, but you have a deep belief that says it is not possible for you to do that. That belief is sending out its own flow of energy that results in lack of money. Like two forces in opposition, the strongest one will win.

This part of the map is where most of the attention will be placed. There is always a reason you aren’t getting what you want, and usually it is something that is impeding or distorting the flow of energy that otherwise would be making your dreams come true!

But no worries, this can be changed and healed! That is the phenomenal news!! Everything that isn’t working in your life can change! You deserve a life of your dreams. That is what you came here to live!

So what happens after you have massaged the flow of energy to be in accordance with your desires?

Take inspired action!

Actions do speak louder than words. Actions tell the universe you are serious about having this thing you want. They tell your subconscious mind you intend to receive it. And the action should be part of the fun – if the action isn’t joyful maybe take another look at whether you really want this thing and whether you really believe you can have it.

There was a man in one of my seminars who was lamenting that he had a speaking business and couldn’t get any gigs. (That he was lamenting should be the first clue as to why he wasn’t more successful.)

Frank: Can you help me manifest some speaking gigs? I started speaking a year ago and I can’t get jobs!

Me: Frank, I know from my own experience in this industry that there are lots of clubs and associations who would love to hear you speak.

Frank: Yeah, I’ve called many of them but they all want me to speak for free.

Me: What’s wrong with speaking for free? You could hone your skill, make contacts, experience the joy of the work…

 

Frank: Well, the thing is, I don’t really like the speaking part. I like the money part. And speakers make a lot of money.

Well, it is unlikely Frank is going to ever be one of those speakers. His beliefs (flow of energy) may be:

1. I don’t have much money.
2. I must find a career that makes me a lot of money.
3. I can’t do what I love and be well paid.
4. I must martyr myself in order to prosper.
5. Money is hard to make.
6. Speaking is hard to succeed at.

So his actions were not joyful, nor were they bringing him closer to his desire. Are you beginning to see how these pieces of the map fit together?

And note: it is take inspired action. Not any old action for the sake of crossing it off the list. Inspired action!

What is inspired action? It is action that feels good and right and true. This inspiration to act generally comes after you flow the energy.

Have you ever had a wish or desire to do something that was a bit past your comfort zone? Have you ever talked yourself into thinking you could have it, gotten all excited about this idea or concept and seen it fully manifest in your mind? From that place, taking action is fun, exciting even.

Have you also had a dream seem to fall apart in your mind before it ever got started? From that place it is nearly impossible to act at all let alone out of joy.

Why does this happen? Because the energy flow gets disrupted; you begin to imagine the failure, not the success of the dream. And action stops.

Inspiration to act comes after we are feeling like nothing can stop us, like we are on the top of the world, like everything we desire is not only possible, but probable.

Taking action ideally strengthens the dream and the flow. And then,

See your reality respond to you!

Ok you have a desire; you have fed it and supported it by taking action.  How do you know whether it is working? Your reality will tell you if it is working!! Is your reality changing? And how?

It doesn’t need to take a long time to receive feedback. Often you see your reality shift within hours. Sometimes it will take days but usually less than three days to see something shifting.

When I first began working on manifesting monetary abundance, I did a short (less than a minute) visualization technique. Two hours later I walked out to the mailbox and there was a check in the mail. The check was delivered to the wrong address, and it wasn’t made out to me, but it was a check in my mailbox! That was a sign that my flow was working.

Within a month the exact amount I desired (several thousand dollars) did come into my reality, but if I hadn’t responded to the initial signs positively it may not have.

Respond in this section of the map means both

1. Look for the response in your world and
2. How do you respond to that response?

In this case, I responded with excitement! My techniques were working!! I celebrated!

And if (and when) you don’t see your world changing, or, heaven forbid, your world changes in the opposite way – less money, etc?

You respond accordingly… you go back to the dream, clarify it further, go back to the flow, look for hidden beliefs etc. You respond with “Hey, I’m not perfect and I’m new at this to boot, but I feel in my bones this is real and I will figure it out and heal what needs healing, change what needs changing and I WILL consciously create a life I love!”

You forgive yourself for not doing it perfectly.

And you keep trying. You can create your world consciously. Know that. Commit to doing whatever it takes to make that happen.

And that is what you do when you are doing ‘the work’ of creating.

What do you do the rest of the time?

You feel as much joy, in the moment, as you can – all the while living your life (emotionally) as if you already have the dream!

This is a critical piece folks. So many people spend five minutes hoping for their dreams then spend the next 16 hours focusing on scarcity, struggle and lack. You are flowing energy all day long. Be conscious of that and flow some love, joy and positivity.

And if you can think of yourself already having the dream, all the better! Your creation can manifest super fast!

How do you do that? Well, for instance, during the years I was learning about manifesting abundance I was driving an old, junky car. I imagined myself driving a new, jazzy convertible. I drove the old car as if it were the most expensive car in the world. I took care of it, kept it clean and treated it like it was worth 10 times what it was.

Needless to say this is my current car:

And that’s all there is to conscious creation folks… unless, you want it to be easier, more elegant, and more fun. What then?

Ask for help.

The ‘help’ are the little sparkly stars in the map. You see, you can do it alone. But you don’t have to. You have unseen friends. Scores of them. And they want to help you but they won’t interfere unless you ask. So invite them in. And receive their help, their guidance, their support, their healing. They won’t do it for you, but they will give you a leg up.

These are the bones of the map.

Conscious creation is not really this linear. Sometimes you’ll get to action and go back and change the dream. Sometimes you’ll see the response and get so excited you want to go back and do more technique. Creating is more of a dance than a map. But this will give you a template to begin your process. And it works. It works. Isn’t that freaking awesome!!???

So what are you waiting for? Stop reading this right now and go write down your intentions! This is the most amazing journey of your life… YOU create it all. What will you create?

In joyful creation,

Boni